While Microsoft keeps bending over backwards to answer complaints no one ever had, such as “The Windows Start button is still on the bottom left of the screen, where it’s been my entire life,” the very real complaints of “Hey where’s that fun game that used to be on here,” remain unaddressed. Now of course a lot of these games that we fondly remember from the Windows computers of our youths are readily available online, but that’s not the point. Trying to play SkiFree ? Go fuck yourself, I guess. Looking for an amalgamation of Chrome OS and macOS? Check. You can’t tell me they didn’t also have time to tuck some fun little games into a folder or some shit. They also had five years to get their dumb heads out of their shitty asses and put the classic games back on there. That means these losers had five years to fine tune some things and steal some innovations from their competition. It would appear that this top ten game of all time that was given to every PC user for years has been deemed unfit to be included in Windows operating system releases these days. In short, the game plays like it’s rigged.Microsoft has released its highly publicized, widely scrutinized newest operating system, an update to its pioneering software simply called Windows 11, and it features one glaring omission.Īs with any major overhaul to your PC’s operating system, the new version improves some things, and sadly leaves a few innovations on the table, most notably fucking godamn Space Cadet 3D Pinball, which they always used to just throw in there for fun. If it’s coming down that ramp there’s a roughly 7/10 chance that it’ll just eat your ball. The reentry ramp or whatever it’s called has a nasty habit of sending your ball straight through the gates as well. I’ll hit the launch pad ramp several times in a row trying to engage a mission, and the second I get the mission and need one more hit on the ramp, the power in the flippers change so I can no longer make the same shot I just made 5 times in a row. The inconsistencies with the flippers are ridiculous as well. I beat my high score several times, and all times but one, the ball just fell straight through the gates right after the launch without me having the chance to hit it once. After a high score is beat, the ball will drop straight between the flippers after the initial launch several times in a row. That being said The flippers will give out and not work, conveniently when you need to get the hit to beat a score or hit a mission. The game is very fun and great for when you have a few minutes of free time. This really limits how far you can take the game, and when you can lose a ball through no fault of your own, the extra balls are an especially important mechanic. My main thing is with the 2 ball limit with no way to get extras through gameplay. When this happens the game just spawns a new ball at the top of the board. The ball can get stuck in some places, the most frequent seeming to be by the black hole under the ramp on the left. The physics that this game uses is a little different than the original. Games are limited to 2 balls, or 3 if you watch an ad. Text comes up saying that you got an extra ball but you never get one. Whenever the game would normally award you an extra ball, you get nothing here. That being said, the game leaves much to be desired in some areas. It’s good to play when you’ve got a few minutes. The noises are the same, the layout of the board is the same, the game’s mechanics work similarly. I’ll start out by saying that of course it’s gonna be hard to measure up to the expectations that come with nostalgia. With all that being said, it’s obvious there are plenty of bugs in the game, but if you can get past them then you’ll really enjoy this classic game. For instance you could turn the music off and keep the sounds on in the original. We also lost quite a bit of the original settings here for some reason. Points are not added instantly, for example when you hit a spinner the points don’t show up until the spinner is done moving. If you earn an extra ball from shooting the ramp to the right you never receive an extra ball. There are no initial shot bonuses like the original. When you go into a telliporter a light used to blink three times signifying which port the ball was going to launch out of. The high score board only shows the highest score, the original showed 5-10 scores. You can get an extra ball to play a full game but it’ll cost you an add and about 30 seconds of your life. The game does not allow three balls per game, it only allows two. I’ve got to admit I had some pretty high hopes for this game since I used to play it quite often on my Windows Millennium Edition PC, but this isn’t quite what you’d expect if you were looking for the identical game.
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